A Man of Sorrows

El Greco, “Man of Sorrows.”

---

By Pastora Cate Covert

With relief, I mark the end of the “holiday” season; that stretch of months from late November to January 1 is a hard time of year for me.

I remember holidays from bygone years celebrated with people no longer with me.

Some have died.

Some have drifted away.

Some have betrayed me and disappeared.

Some have dropped me or stuffed me down a memory hole they never revisit except for the obligatory birthday text message.

Every year, I struggle with loneliness—the feeling of being an earth orphan (a title I gave myself in my twenties). I know I’m not alone in feeling alone.

It’s a weird trait of humans that we keep the memories of others frozen in our minds; they do not grow beyond our last encounter with them. If we haven’t seen them since they were teenagers, we try to categorize and classify the adult persons we see standing in front of us. If they are patient, they might stick around to correct our assumptions as we catch up; if not, we go into the category of NPC (non-playable character) or simple irrelevance. We waste so much when we overlook the people God has placed in our lives.

I think of Jesus at times like this: the rejection He faced from his “hometown” of Nazareth—the stigma of false accusations, the disappointment that those with whom He grew up could not muster faith to believe that the man who had lived and worked among them since boyhood was actually the Son of the Most High God in human form.

Jesus was a man of sorrows, acquainted with grief. Isaiah’s poignant prophecy of His coming is deep and profoundly stirring. When I suffer from rejection, I recall these words and realize that HE suffered on my behalf—not just physically but emotionally and mentally as well.

I think of how Jesus suffered so that you and I could be a source of future joy to Him. Here is Isaiah’s description of his then-future Messiah:

(1) “Who has believed our report? And to whom has the arm of the LORD been revealed?  (2)  For He shall grow up before Him as a tender plant, And as a root out of dry ground. He has no form or comeliness; And when we see Him, There is no beauty that we should desire Him.  (3)  He is despised and rejected by men, A Man of sorrows and acquainted with grief. And we hid, as it were, our faces from Him; He was despised, and we did not esteem Him.  (4)  Surely He has borne our griefs And carried our sorrows; Yet we esteemed Him stricken, Smitten by God, and afflicted.  (5)  But He was wounded for our transgressions, He was bruised for our iniquities; The chastisement for our peace was upon Him, And by His stripes we are healed.  (6)  All we like sheep have gone astray; We have turned, every one, to his own way; And the LORD has laid on Him the iniquity of us all.  (7)  He was oppressed and He was afflicted, Yet He opened not His mouth; He was led as a lamb to the slaughter, And as a sheep before its shearers is silent, So He opened not His mouth.  (8)  He was taken from prison and from judgment, And who will declare His generation? For He was cut off from the land of the living; For the transgressions of My people He was stricken.  (9)  And they made His grave with the wicked—But with the rich at His death, Because He had done no violence, Nor was any deceit in His mouth.  (10)  Yet it pleased the LORD to bruise Him; He has put Him to grief. When You make His soul an offering for sin, He shall see His seed, He shall prolong His days, And the pleasure of the LORD shall prosper in His hand.  (11)  He shall see the labor of His soul, and be satisfied. By His knowledge My righteous Servant shall justify many, For He shall bear their iniquities.  (12)  Therefore I will divide Him a portion with the great, And He shall divide the spoil with the strong, Because He poured out His soul unto death, And He was numbered with the transgressors, And He bore the sin of many, And made intercession for the transgressors.” Isaiah 53:1-12 

Oh, how He suffered.

Humans judge by appearance. That’s why some people can get by on their attractive looks or at least make an impact to help them get what they want. Others must strive when they are unremarkable. Jesus didn’t have an appearance that would leave an impression, no beauty to make people desire Him.

Though Jesus was born in Bethlehem, He and His family moved to Egypt when He was little to escape the slaughter of the innocents (King Herod heard there was a newborn king, so he killed all the potential competition—every baby boy two years and under).

When they returned from Egypt, they moved to Nazareth. We’ve heard the saying, “Can anything good come from Nazareth?” He had wisdom and authority when He taught, but He was despised by the religious leaders—leaders of the faith of His own Father—because He didn’t have the right connections. There were whispers that He was illegitimate, and because of the hardness of their hearts, the people in His hometown rejected Him so He could do no miracles there aside from healing a few.

Jesus was a man of sorrows, acquainted with grief, which was apparently evident to onlookers because they assumed God was punishing Him for His sins, so they hid their faces from Him.

Yet, He was innocent and volunteered to take the wounds for our transgressions, the bruises for our iniquities, the chastisement (judgment, mockery, ridicule, false imprisonment, torture, and death) needed to give us peace, and with His stripes (the lashes from the terrible whipping He endured before they loaded Him up with His cross and made Him carry it to His place of death), we are made complete. He paid our debt in full. He counts us among His redeemed if we have the faith to receive it: pardoned us from our death sentence so that we could receive new life.

The Lord God laid all of our sin on Jesus.

When He was oppressed and tortured, He did not open His mouth! The religious rulers held an illegal court to condemn Him, but He did not protest or say, “Hey, you got it all wrong!” He could have given up the plan to save us and would have been fully justified. He could have called a legion of angels to rescue Him from the cross. But, instead, He took it all.

Jesus never had the chance to marry and have children. He didn’t own property or vineyards or cattle. But He knew He was making the way for future sons and daughters of the Living God to be born into His kingdom, and because of that, He persevered and conquered death and set a multitude of grateful believers free.

Please notice: in all of His suffering, Jesus never sinned. He did not curse the day of His birth or those who did not understand. He never deviated from the course He and the Father agreed on before Jesus was miraculously born to His happy parents: Mary and the Holy Spirit of God—water and Spirit.

When I am downhearted, I can sometimes sin with my mind. But Jesus never sinned, and that’s a foreign concept to humanity. We really cannot relate to someone who has never sinned because we were born in sin.

But—and I thank God for this—Jesus can relate to us because He was tempted in every way, but He withstood the tests and overcame the temptations so that we who walk in His ways can find a way of escape from those temptations He has already overcome.

(5) “But He was wounded for our transgressions, He was bruised for our iniquities; The chastisement for our peace was upon Him, And by His stripes we are healed.” Isaiah 53:5

I thought how easy it is to fall into self-pity when things are not going my way; this includes bereavement, unremitting physical pain, impeded mobility, and loneliness. I came up with an analogy.

If you’ve ever done a travel route on Mapquest or Rand McNally, you know how to put in a starting point and a destination to find the best roads to travel.

So, using that model to describe the journey from point A to point B in our personal Via Dolorosa, I noticed that under the right circumstances, it’s a short trip from self-pity to reconciliation and peace with God.

Start—Self-pity

Destination: Reconciliation in our spirits and peace with God.

Total trip mileage: 5 mi.

Total time: 10 min.

BUT: In our effort to make ourselves feel better, suppose we get sidetracked. Suppose we allow our souls to stray into error and add more stops before we reach our destination. Our road might look something like the following.

Start—Self-pity

Add (First leg of the journey)—the envy of others: added mileage 30 mi, added time 60 min.

Add (Second leg of the journey)—needing someone to blame: added mileage 15 mi, added time 30 min.

Add (Third leg of the journey)—comparing ourselves with those we view as successful: added mileage 25 mi, added time 50 min.

Add (Detour if we aren’t careful)—Blaming God: added mileage 1250 mi., added time 2500 min. While we are busy with a detour, remember the meter is running in this taxi, and the driver will keep charging until we pay the fare.

Destination: Reconciliation in our spirits and peace with God.

What should have been a quick trip along a scenic route has become a nightmare of fog in a bog. There is no telling how long it will take to get to our desired haven if we do not shepherd our souls correctly.

Knowing that Jesus did everything necessary to reconcile us to our loving Father, how do we avoid this negative addition to our trip?

If anyone had a reason to be sad, hurt, or rejected, it was Jesus when He walked this earth as a man.

(14) “Therefore, since we have a great high priest who has ascended into heaven, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold firmly to the faith we profess.  (15)  For we do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet he did not sin.  (16)  Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.” Hebrews 4:14-16 

Jesus was tempted to self-pity, but He did not allow Himself to be bogged down. He felt grief and sorrow, yet He handled it properly, without sin. How do we follow His example?

The answer is in verse 16 above. “Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.

Grace and mercy are available when we confidently draw near to our Abba (Father). This confidence to approach the throne of the King may seem like a foreign concept to some. We might ask, “What inspires such confidence?”

The writer of Hebrews states a little later:

“And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him.” Hebrews 11:6 

There is something cathartic about admitting grief, pain, or sorrow. Our culture only allows a momentary nod to such things, often following a shallow question, “How are you?” Some of us have learned not to answer truthfully if the asker will be uncomfortable with us telling the truth—because it doesn’t help grease the wheels of easy conversation. Those who have long suffered have learned to keep the conversation rolling or to disengage politely.

There is a certain holiness in honest suffering and sorrowing. One of the fruits of the Holy Spirit is longsuffering.

(22) “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness,  (23)  gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law.” Galatians 5:22-23 

Another way to put it is patience in affliction. The Greek language renders it this way.

Μακροθυμία makrothumia mak-roth-oo-mee'-ah

From the same as G3116; longanimity, that is, (objectively) forbearance or (subjectively) fortitude: - longsuffering, patience. Total KJV occurrences: 14

It is not necessarily virtuous to suffer, so please don’t misunderstand; the virtue comes through properly handling your soul in the presence of God, as Jesus did.

How this works out for each of us is tailored to our spiritual needs and presided over by a Father who passionately loves us and is determined to help us achieve perfection and wholeness—fit for the Kingdom of God.

I will prove it here:

(22) “For we know that the whole creation groans and labors with birth pangs together until now.  (23)  Not only that, but we also who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, even we ourselves groan within ourselves, eagerly waiting for the adoption, the redemption of our body.  (24)  For we were saved in this hope, but hope that is seen is not hope; for why does one still hope for what he sees?  (25)  But if we hope for what we do not see, we eagerly wait for it with perseverance.  (26)  Likewise the Spirit also helps in our weaknesses. For we do not know what we should pray for as we ought, but the Spirit Himself makes intercession for us with groanings which cannot be uttered.  (27)  Now He who searches the hearts knows what the mind of the Spirit is, because He makes intercession for the saints according to the will of God.  (28)  And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.” Romans 8:22-28 

The Spirit within us groans and eagerly waits for the adoption and redemption of our body. But we are not alone in this suffering. The Spirit helps us in our weakness and makes intercession for us with groanings that cannot be uttered. He makes intercession for us according to the will of God, and He causes all things to work together for good to those who love God and are called according to His purpose.

To quote King David, “Such knowledge is too high; I cannot attain it.” (Psalm 139:6) Yet it is true. God is kind and compassionate, merciful and full of grace, working all things in our lives together for good, and as we forebear or suffer long, we will find our safe harbor under the shelter of His wings. An end will come to our suffering, and there is joy in our destination to keep us hopeful on the way.

(27) “Why do you say, O Jacob, And speak, O Israel: “My way is hidden from the LORD, And my just claim is passed over by my God”?  (28)  Have you not known? Have you not heard? The everlasting God, the LORD, The Creator of the ends of the earth, Neither faints nor is weary. His understanding is unsearchable.  (29)  He gives power to the weak, And to those who have no might He increases strength.  (30)  Even the youths shall faint and be weary, And the young men shall utterly fall,  (31)  But those who wait on the LORD Shall renew their strength; They shall mount up with wings like eagles, They shall run and not be weary, They shall walk and not faint.” Isaiah 40:27-31 

In closing, listen to the words of King David, who was a man after God’s own heart, whose testimony was one of suffering for 25 years after he was anointed to be the second king of Israel—whom the deposed King Saul hunted with deadly intent, forcing David and his men to hide in caves and rocks in the wilderness.

(1) “A Psalm. A Song At the Dedication of the House of David. I will extol You, O LORD, for You have lifted me up, And have not let my foes rejoice over me.  (2)  O LORD my God, I cried out to You, And You healed me.  (3)  O LORD, You brought my soul up from the grave; You have kept me alive, that I should not go down to the pit.  (4)  Sing praise to the LORD, you saints of His, And give thanks at the remembrance of His holy name.  (5)  For His anger is but for a moment, His favor is for life; Weeping may endure for a night, But joy comes in the morning.  (6)  Now in my prosperity I said, “I shall never be moved.”  (7)  LORD, by Your favor You have made my mountain stand strong; You hid Your face, and I was troubled.  (8)  I cried out to You, O LORD; And to the LORD I made supplication:  (9)  “What profit is there in my blood, When I go down to the pit? Will the dust praise You? Will it declare Your truth?  (10)  Hear, O LORD, and have mercy on me; LORD, be my helper!”  (11)  You have turned for me my mourning into dancing; You have put off my sackcloth and clothed me with gladness,  (12)  To the end that my glory may sing praise to You and not be silent. O LORD my God, I will give thanks to You forever.” Psalms 30:1-12 

As you meditate on these good verses, may the Lord comfort you in your sorrow, grief, and pain. May He make you firm and steadfast in faith amid suffering as you keep your eyes on Him. May He turn your mourning into dancing and exchange your sackcloth for gladness and praise.

Shalom shalom,

Pastora Cate Covert